Rewind 2014

Seventeen days into 2015. 

What a hectic new year. What a challenging new year.

Last time, in December 2013, we were tested with the most bitter event in our family. It was the first time I had a terrible stress gastritis, after a traumatic and emotional reactions towards that event. We ended our year of 2013 with horrible feelings. Undescribable. We then started the year of 2014 with a new hope. A hope that everything will go back to normal, or even better. We started recuperating and healing. Yet that was just for a short moment. We lost someone very valuable to the family. Someone who we hope we can depend to. He chose to walk away from our lives, his own blood ties, for some reasons only Allah knows, very hurtful. He left, and never came back. We did look for him but return in empty hands and false hopes.

How fast 2014 flew. With three airplanes mishaps and many lives lost. December 2014, while everyone was preparing for a new hope, we were tested again. A big flood wiped out Kelantan, Terengganu, Pahang and certain areas in Perak. Families got separated temporarily and permanently. Belongings were no longer belongings. With all the weeping events, I myself ended and started 2014-2015 with mortality. Having attended a state level mortality meeting on the 2nd of January is the worst new year gift. I was too occupied with all these events until I forgot to feel the new year air. 2015 passed one day by one day just like that. 

The last two weeks had been tough. I knew it when my body was exhausted, I would end up feeling sick. This time I was down with URTI. Sometimes what I need is just some rests. No need vacation, no need present, and no need money. Just rest.

Despite all that happened, some people just choose to ignore the hikmah behind it. Some people still choose to ignore their parents, some people still choose to increase their world wealthiness and ignore their akhirah. Some people keep on living with their sins without thinking that tomorrow might be their last day to breathe. 

It was really hurtful when someone you love and trust said something really mean. Speechless. I lived with that words in my mind for the past few days. It wasn't easy to forget and forgive. I pray that this feelings won't be long.

A few points to ponder anyway, this year I turned into ehurmm, time to be mature enough, time to continue my journey in medical career, time to seriously looking for a soul mate, time to move on, time to increase my investment for jannah, time to forgive and forget, time to get back all my skills. Currently busy with preparation for an Islamic event, insyaAllah on 1st of February, and preparation for my beloved mak and ayah too...May Allah ease all of these, amin.